Dear John,

Thank you for the lovely gift, it was a nice surprise to see after a long day of grocery shopping, baking, cooking your dinner; not to mention the long month of dealing with a cranky night working husband and PMS'ing "pre"-teens. I can take a hint, I understand that I have been a bit grumpy, but I am sure mad is much to strong of a word. Sure maybe hostile, quarrelsome, resisting; or maybe antisocial, cold, cool, disagreeable, disapproving, distant, frigid, or icy; but mad? Maybe you meant crazy mad, but really you and me switch spots and we will see who is the grounded one.

I apologize for making you feel disregarded, forgotten, ignored, or overlooked; but promise that as soon as your socks and underwear are folded, the cat box is clean and the the summer toys are washed I will be feeling a bit more like my self; maybe a bit more caring, compassionate, considerate, cordial, doting, forgiving, friendly, kind, warmhearted; and if you are really lucky ardent, fervent, passionate, warm; amatory, amorous, erotic; enamored, infatuated, lovesick; mushy, romantic, and sentimental.

Your loving housewife?
Heidi

PS- please, I am not quite sure I am feeling it. Please send another bottle (or two) and the rest of dirty laundry...and don't forget to feed the cat.